I am writing this as some have said to me that I have not been healed of cancer because of my lack of faith. ( I so wanted to say to this brother, well it didn't work to keep your marriage together now did it? But the Lord did not want me to lash out in revenge) I have a hard time with believers who use the Bible and twist the scriptures to fit their own little mold of what Yeshua or Abba Father means in his word. I spoke to a brother earlier today who brought this example up to me and I went and read it and was amazed at what the Lord showed me. I grew up in the name it claim it movement where they used the verse from (Complete Jewish Bible) Psalm 37:4. Then you will delight yourself in ADONAI, and he will give you your heart's desire. They believed that if anything was going wrong in your life, like with sickness or lack of wealth and so on was because you were not delighting yourself in the Lord. Our desires should be what God desires of us, not some selfish wants in life. Don't get me wrong as I believe in healing and I believe that the Lord wants us to prosper. But we need to have a balance in our lives. Sometimes as believers we have been conditioned to believe that everything in our lives should be going well and if it is not, then there is something we are doing wrong. We have no ideal what it means to suffer, let alone to suffer for Christ's sake. Are we in relationship with the Lord only when things are going right in our lives? Or are we in relationship with the Lord for the long haul? Are we gonna stay faithful to the very end. And inbetween? There is an old saying that Christians are the only one who kills their wounded. And in the body of Christ we shouldn't be that way. For those who know me, I am the last one you should ask if I believe in healing or miracles. When I started on this journey of faith about 7 years ago, I have seen some awesome healing and miracles in my own life. I know without a doubt that the Lord can remove this cancer from me. But he can also use and has used what is going on with me concerning the cancer as well as other health issues in my life. And I will not even begin to get into the difference between healing and miracles and the many ways that can happen. But I will say, that healing can come in the form of taking you home for eternity and giving you a new body. This is not the way I would want things at this point in my life. But I have done a lot of thinking and praying and the one thing I realize is the Lord has done many healing as well as miracles in my life. There was a time in my life that I did not want to live and tried many times to end my own life. Especially when my son passed away. He was at that time the only reason I stayed alive. There came a time in my life where I either had to die, or I had to live. It was a choice I had to make. When I realized I had a purpose in this life and that no matter what conditon I was in, I could learn to live and love the life I have, that is when things started changing in me. The last 7 years I have lived an awesome life and I have so many friends who truly love and care about me. I remember the days when I did not have friends and did not want to live. I have been blessed beyond being blessed in that as I started to wake up each day and find something positive and good in my life, then I could enjoy life and the Lord opened the doors to bring awesome people in my life who did not mind being in my life. It is not easy waking up each day knowing you are living on borrowed time. But then again we all are living on borrowed time. We were all born to die. But I have a chocie each day to decide how I am going to live. Am I going to let what is happening in my life define me? Or am I going to let my faith define me? As bad as my situation may seem, I can still find others in my local community as well as around the world who have it far more worse than myself. That reminds me of how truly blessed I really am. Below is the story of Hizkiyahu and how he was ill to the point of death. And how the Lord gave him 15 more years. I have no ideal what the Lord is gonna do with my life as far as having cancer and other things I do not understand. But what I do want is for this not to be wasted, rather used to bring glory and honor to the Lord. I also wish to thank all those in my life who have been supportive in helping me walk this journey of faith the last 7 years and for all that you have taught me. Mainly about trusting in the Lord no matter what.
This is the what another brother in the Lord shared with me today.
2 Kings 20 (Complete Jewish Bible)
(1) Around this time, Hizkiyahu became ill to the point of death. Yesha'yahu the prophet, the son of Amotz, came and said to him, "Here is what ADONAI says: 'Put your house in order, because you are going to die; you will not live.'" (2) Hizkiyahu turned his face toward the wall and prayed to ADONAI: (3) "I plead with you, ADONAI, remember now how I have lived before you truly and wholeheartedly, and how I have done what you see as good." And he cried bitter tears. (4) Before Yesha'yahu had left the city's middle courtyard, the word of ADONAI came to him: (5) "Go back, and tell Hizkiyahu the prince of my people, that this is what ADONAI, the God of David your ancestor, says: 'I have heard your prayer and seen your tears, and I will heal you. On the third day, you are to go up to the house of ADONAI. (6) I will add fifteen years to your life. Also I will rescue you and this city from the power of the king of Ashur; I will defend this city for my own sake and for my servant David's sake.'" (7) Then Yesha'yahu said, "Prepare a fig-plaster." They brought it and laid it on the inflammation, so that he would recover.
Also I am going to post many scriptures that have helped me especially during this time of my life cancer. I don't believe that anything I am going through is being wasted. Their is a purpose for all of it. I can only pray that he will continue to strengthen me durring this time and use what I am going through for his glory.
Deuteronomy 31:6 “ …Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you.”
Psalms 138:3 On the day I called, you answered me; my strength of soul you increased.
Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.
Matthew 11:28-29 Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.
2 Corinthians 1:3-4 Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.
Psalms 18:6 In my distress I called upon the Lord; to my God I cried for help. From his temple he heard my voice, and my cry to him reached his ears.
Psalms 33:20-22 Our soul waits for the LORD; he is our help and our shield. For our heart is glad in him, because we trust in his holy name. Let your steadfast love, O LORD, be upon us, even as we hope in you.
Philippians 1:6 And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.
Philippians 4:6-7 …do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
1 Peter 5:6-7 Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.
Ecclesiastes 3:1 For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven
(This one is my favorite and my life verse) Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.
John 14:1-3
“Let not your hearts be troubled. Believe in God; believe also in me. In my Father’s house are many rooms. If it were not so, would I have told you that I go to prepare a place for you? And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and will take you to myself, that where I am you may be also…”
Romans 8:16-17 The Spirit himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God, and if children, then heirs—heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ, provided we suffer with him in order that we may also be glorified with him.
Romans 8:24-25 For in this hope we were saved. Now hope that is seen is not hope. For who hopes for what he sees? But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience.
Romans 8:38-39 For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.
1 Peter 1:3 Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! According to his great mercy, he has caused us to be born again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead
Lamentations 3:21-24 (21) This I recall to my mind, therefore have I hope . (22) It is of the LORD'S mercies that we are not consumed , because his compassions fail not. (23) They are new every morning: great is thy faithfulness. (24) The LORD is my portion, saith my soul; therefore will I hope in him.
Psalms 91:1,2 He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will abide in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say to the LORD, “My refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.”
James 1:2-4 Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.
1 Peter 1:6-9 In this you rejoice, though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been grieved by various trials, so that the tested genuineness of your faith—more precious than gold that perishes though it is tested by fire—may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ. Though you have not seen him, you love him. Though you do not now see him, you believe in him and rejoice with joy that is inexpressible and filled with glory, obtaining the outcome of your faith, the salvation of your souls.
Psalms 85:8 Let me hear what God the LORD will speak, for he will speak peace to his people, to his saints
Isaiah 26:3,4 You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you. Trust in the LORD forever, for the LORD GOD is an everlasting rock.
Matthew 11:28-30 “Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.” (Jesus’ words)
John 14:27 “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid.” (Jesus’ words)
Psalms 27:5,6 For he will hide me in his shelter in the day of trouble;
he will conceal me under the cover of his tent; he will lift me high upon a rock. And now my head shall be lifted up above my enemies all around me, and I will offer in his tent sacrifices with shouts of joy; I will sing and make melody to the LORD.
John 9:1-3 As he passed by, he saw a man blind from birth. And his disciples asked him, “Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?” Jesus answered, “It was not that this man sinned, or his parents, but that the works of God might be displayed in him.
2 Corinthians 1:8,9 For we do not want you to be ignorant, brothers of the affliction we experienced in Asia. For we were so utterly burdened beyond our strength that we despaired of life itself. Indeed, we felt that we had received the sentence of death. But that was to make us rely not on ourselves but on God who raises the dead.
2 Corinthians 1:10,11 He delivered us from such a deadly peril, and he will deliver us. On him we have set our hope that he will deliver us again. You also must help us by prayer, so that many will give thanks on our behalf for the blessing granted us through the prayers of many.
Philippians 1:12-14 I want you to know, brothers, that what has happened to me has really served to advance the gospel, so that it has become known throughout the whole imperial guard and to all the rest that my imprisonment is for Christ. And most of the brothers, having become confident in the Lord by my imprisonment, are much more bold to speak the word without fear.
Romans 8:18-21 For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us. For the creation waits with eager longing for the revealing of the sons of God. For the creation was subjected to futility, not willingly, but because of him who subjected it, in hope that the creation itself will be set free from its bondage to corruption and obtain the freedom of the glory of the children of God.
2 Corinthians 4:16-18 So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal.
2 Corinthians 9:8 And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that having all sufficiency in all things at all times, you may abound in every good work.
1 Peter 1:3-5 Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! According to his great mercy, he has caused us to be born again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, to an inheritance that is imperishable, undefiled, and unfading, kept in heaven for you, who by God’s power are being guarded through faith for a salvation ready to be revealed in the last time.
Revelation 21:3,4 And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Behold, the dwelling place of God is with man. He will dwell with them, and they will be his people, and God himself will be with them as their God. He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away.”
There is a possibility that I may have repeated some scriptures. But I hope this will answer the questions that others have asked me on whether I believe the Lord is going to heal me or not. Also I hope it will stop those who say to me that I am still sick because of my lack of faith or confession. I have no ideal what kind of cruel god you believe in, but the Abba Father I believe in is not as you portray him to be. I serve an awesome loving Father that cares and loves me even when I feel weak and don't feel like I have the strength in me to keep going on. He renews my strength daily and he puts others in my path to encourage me with exactly what I need to hear when I need to hear it. I am thankful for all those who are walking this journey with me and helping to encourage me and lift me up in prayer. I love you all, Candy
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